Talk:Vampire/@comment-68.224.146.171-20100818170305

UGH I literally think I lost brain cells trying to understand all of your rambled chit chattings. First off. For all you kiddies who want to be 20 when you get turned. Yea well, what if you're fat? Now, this is in no offense to any larger people AT ALL. When it comes down to real hard fact, you will. NEVER, be able to lose weight. (IF YOU'RE UNDER...PUBERTY AGE DON'T READ THIS)Just like you would NEVER be able to get it on. See the skin would be too hard to for the guy and if you are a vamp female....There's not going to be a thing to lubricate it.(OK YOU CAN READ IT AGAIN UNDER PUBERTY AGED CHILDREN..hehehe) 'some ppl say twilight vampires are not realistic, but actually THEY ARE MORE REALISTIC THAN CLASSIC VAMPIRES.becuz, i mean, WHY WUD ANYONE DIE FROM HOLY WATER(atheist vampire?) AND A WOODEN STAKE (a stick, in the form of the letter "T"...please) twilight vamps make much more sense' To the writer of this...exceedingly...obnoxious comment. Twilight vampires are NOT real. But neither is Count Dracula. Shocker..I know*eye roll* Count Dracula was at least based on a REAL person. A REAL CLASSICAL vampire would die from Holy water because it has been blessed. Vampires are supposed to be evil*cue the creepy music*. And F.Y.I just cuz someone is an atheist does not in fact mean that they will die with blessed water. No They are not the wicked witch of the west. And this is where Facebook picks it up :D No my dear friend, a wooden stake infact DOES NOT kill them, you're right. It puts them into topur(Coma-like state). No Twilight vampires make NO sense. They sparkle in the god forsaken sun. Ok now granted that the vampire's photosynthetic processes get all jacked up( http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Why_are_vampires_allergic_to_the_sunlight ), i could...kind of BARELY let that one slide away untouched. But really? If we wanted fairies we woulda captured Tinkerbell. Gah! ...Vegetarians. Really?! V-E-G-E-T-A-R-I-A-N-S?! Really...REALLY NOW?! ok. First let's look at the definition of VEGETARIAN 'eater of fruits and grains and nuts; someone who eats no meat or fish or (often) any animal products'. Does it say anywhere on there that Oh ok....blood isn't part of an animal.It's ok. it doesn't count. NO NO NO NO NO!!!! VAMPIRES CAN.NOT.BE.VEGETARIANS....Oh shit...I'm typing in caps! :o Ok now back to the 'allergies' of a REAL vampire.Running water. Now I'm not exactly sure of why original vamps could not cross over them but researching I've seen mostly and most likely because running water can be a symbolism of Purification. Which vampires are.NOT(pure that is!).They are non-vegetarian blood sucking CRUEL animals. Oh and evil! Oh and also, now I don't know if this was true to the original Vampire lore, but I'm guessing that Vampires cannot see themselves because they have no souls. Or as one user had put it on Yahoo! because mirrors used to be lined with silver and mercury. And silver is known to superstitiously keep evil away....or something like that. Ok now...about this whole NON-sleeping issue. If i were you and I got had the chance to be turned. Hell Freaking NO. Sleep is something I live for. And Twilight vampires don't need to sleep in their coffin? Well...ok. As long as they have a clump of dirt from where they were buried at in their pocket, i can deal. Not sleeping? I don't even know how to respond. The reason they have their coffins, from what i believe is to hide from the fireball in the sky we call the sun. So at the end of the twitard wiki page, there is the list of what is diff from classicals and ...those.......things. One of the thing there is this 'They require only a simple bite to turn a human.' Ok. Makes no sense to me cuz thats how classics did it too. And I could care less about the bat thing, cuz I never really understood it anyway... And finally...They do not have fangs....How PRECIOUS. NOT. Ok. first of all Vampire ->Blood->human!/Animal!-> Biting! WAIT NO MY TEETH CAN DO THE STUPID THING BECAUSE I STILL HAVE HUMAN TEETH!! NOOOO *victim(s) flee* Aww poor twilight vampire....NOT. Sure vampires can be pretty and blah but typically...eh. give or take a couple of thousands of years you won't think you're pretty anymore. Vampirism is supposed to be a curse. Not some la-di-freaking-da fantasy that every girl wants because Edward Cullen advertises is. Every girl that wants EDWARD CULLEN(not robert pattinson. there's a difference...Shocker...I know) has a serious case of fictional necrophilia. remember kiddies vampirism is a curse! not a blessing.trying living until the one you love DIES and you'e still young. That's pretty friggin sad in my opinion. but if you say you don't care and that you would be a vamp for E.C.. girl...boy...you're living your cursed life for no one aawww my kitty wants to cuddle with me. hillbillys accent*Better watch out for them veggie-tarian vampeers cat!